It was abrupt and to the point

Sorry the last entry was so abrupt...but I am upset today. I mean- come on...in HS they tell you if you miss a pill your life is over because you will get pregnant. well- NEWS FLASH- its been 2 years since I was on the Pill...

Matt and I want to have a child of our own in the worst way. Being parents is important to us- and sometimes I think about how long it is taking and I just don't want to get out of bed. What is there to get up for? The cat gets in bed when Matt leaves...so hes by my side. He knows I'm upset and he tries to comfort me. It reminds me of Magnum whenever I was sad...he always wanted to be by my side. and I think if he lived with us he would still be there...

I don't want anyone to think I'm depressed or anything, but I really feel very strongly about being a parent. God has taken one child away from me, and I understand that he has his reasons, but what are his reasons now? Married- Check. In Love-Check. Financially situated- Check. Suitable Home-Check....so- now what?

I also wanted to tell everyone my sleeping pattern has returned to semi-normal. Up at 10(unless its Monday or Thursday) and to bed at 2. Its a healthy 8 hours.